Women are crazy and men are stupid. The reason women are crazy is because men are so stupid...

Or are they.
Are they really the 'enemy'?
Truly at fault for all of our pain, anguish...and yes, crazy?

Some of it, hell ya, most of it, nope.

I have a news flash for you.
Men. Are human.
Yup, you heard it here first.

They cry, they hurt, they feel, they mess up, they smile, they laugh, they fight, they love.
Just like us.
Only differently.
The old mars-venus thing.

We seem to have lost touch with our innate differences, and we somehow expect men to react
and behave the way WE would react and behave as women. Recipe for disaster. Especially since these days we really have problems figuring out WHAT to think.

Do you think our Grandmothers sat there freaking out because a boy didn't call when he said he would?
Ask your Gram. I know what mine would say, 'well he is probably busy, he will call when he can'.
Perfect common sense, and probably true. If you ask a male friend his opinion of the same situation, he would say the same. Right? 'prob busy, i'm sure he'll call when he can'

Ask a gf? 'what? but didn't he say he would call? what a jerk, you deserve better'...

Now, have our expectations of men to behave in such a way as to never disappoint us, never mess up and definitely never make us cry caused a bit of a tightrope performance for them?
Imagine the pressure, if you will, of having those expectations on you in order to have someone sleep with you/like you/love you/smile at you. 

Hell ya, they should work for it. But not bleed for it.

Play hard to get, not impossible to be with.

As women, we don't really instinctively understand these things anymore.
We get wound up over the slightest slight.
We forget.
We forget that we inherently know that by nature, men just don't go around nurturing their relationships in the same way
we do. Not that they don't, or do it badly, they just do it differently.

How many times have you said 'But it's so perfect when we are alone together, but then I don't see him for a week and I freak out and he doesn't call/email/text when he says he will'...
What is more important to you?
That your man loves and respects you when he is with you? or that he calls at precisely 8:45 pm on Tuesday.

I know you are probably saying that it's inconsiderate, that I am letting guys off the hook.
I'm not, trust me. But, I think we need a bit of a reality check.
We are giving them too much power over our happiness.
Think about it. Generations ago, when couples were separated for months at a time 

(war, farming, hunting, gathering..)
all they had was perhaps a letter a week/month. Did people give up on each other? No.
Of course now we can communicate 24/7 if we choose to. But.
Have people's natural instincts and though patterns changed? Have men and women as animals changed?  I don't believe so.

Those inherent differences were there 20/200/2000 yrs ago just as they are today.
Only the wrapping (society) has changed. The expectations have changed.
We expect nothing but the best for ourselves and from our men.
We should want to be content and have a good life.

But, is it fair or reasonable to expect/demand it all?
Have people stopped breaking each others hearts?
Have men stopped cheating? No, and now women do it too, just as often.
Do we understand each other any better?
Nope. So. What's going on?

Times have changed drastically since WWII. I think this was a huge turning point.
Women's place in society has changed, shifted, turned itself end to end a few times.
From the 50's housewife to the powersuit 80's to the political candidates and r+b singers buying themselves their own bling...
But are we any the wiser?

Look at Elizabeth Taylor, Grace Kelly, Marilyn Monroe....beautiful, smart, tragic, flawed, independent...but they never ceased to feel the need to 'connect' with a man (sometimes more than a few times)...and they are seen as weak for this. Flawed for needing/wanting a man.

But is it weak? Or is it natural.

Are our expectations fighting our natural needs, wants, desires and dammit, womanliness...

The 'Patient, Long Suffering' wives/women of our past have made us into 'Impatient, Short Suffering' wives/women of today.
No, I am not saying that I want a return to the kitchen. Although I do have a thing for 50's clothes...but for dancing, not vacuuming.
I am talking bigger picture.
Our perceptions of what we feel is owed to us, what we expect from our lives, what we expect from others and society in general. It's quite amazing really.

In all of our talk about equality, power and fairness, have we been fair to ourselves really? And men?
We have given them even more power now over us then they ever have.
And in turn put more pressure on them to measure up.
Are they really that responsible for our every feeling, how our day might turn out or whether or not we will be happy?
The way some of us talk, you would think so. And you know what, it's normal.
It is natural and human to want to connect and share a life.

It's not a weakness.

But I am not seeing much sharing.
I am seeing a lot of taking. On both sides.
Without giving anything back. Or one gives, the other takes.
Or instant gratification. It's easy isn't it. I've done it. No muss, no fuss, no commitment, no emotional bs.

What I want is for women to get back to what we have seem to have lost.
Our inherent beauty, our gift, the thing that makes us who we are and why men can't and wouldn't want to be without us. And something we should be proud of and not ashamed of, or feel that we are being 'played' because we nurture this in ourselves...

it's the one thing that all great women throughout history have had that we seem to be lacking.

It's Knowing. Just Knowing.