Emotional Pace

Pace, sync, simpatico - whatever you call it. Recently I have discovered that this is one of the most, if not the most, important ingredients in a successful relationship.

It's what some people mean when they say 'timing'. Let's face it, timing isn't about how much money you have, or don't, what kind of job or car you have and whether it all is 'good enough', no, it's about your inner timing.

When one person is more ready for the emotional involvement of a relationship than the other, it's called 'bad timing' for lack of a better word. A relationship demands a great deal of emotional vulnerability, and if you haven't cleared up your shit enough to do that then that's when the trouble starts.

You could want a relationship, meet someone great. Have a fantastic few months, 'I love you's' even spoken, but that doesn't mean you are emotionally ready.
There is this thing that happens with successful couples (note I didn't say 'happy' because no couple is always happy - stop that delusion right now), and that is emotional pace. You both run at the same one. Some couples have one who is just over that hill and one who's further ahead, and it won't work out. Others have one at the bottom and one at the top, again, disaster. You will always be struggling to understand them, and vice versa. It will feel like you do all the work, when they do none. Or if you are at the bottom, you will feel pressured and not ready, sometimes even manipulated.

This seems to happen around the magical 6 month marker. When one day you wake up and realize 'shit, this is a relationship!'. You either panic, or you smile. Or both. If you're lucky, the person you are with is making the same face, and having the same reaction as you. That's damn fine emotional pace. That moment when it clicks - brilliant.

With good emotional pace you don't panic if the other hasn't said 'I love you' yet, you don't freak out if you aren't married within a year, and you take your time - and it seems easy that way. The emotional aspect comes naturally, you flow from one stage to another - no pressure. Emotional pace just being one part, there are other things that can fuck up a good thing. But if you have emotional pace it really does make it easier, more focused as a couple. You are really together, and you feel it.

Nothing is worse than that feeling that you love someone more than they love you, or feeling like you're wasting your time. You love them, but it's just not right and you can't figure it out. You ask yourself 'why?' when it doesn't end well. You remember all the tender good moments, the 'I love you's', and you are left spinning as to why it didn't work. Emotional pace.

Quite often, just to play devil's advocate, a guy will really love and care about a woman, but feel pressured into too much, too soon. Maybe he's not over the last drama of a relationship, maybe he was almost there but not quite, and maybe the woman wasn't ready either - but wanted a relationship so badly that she over-amped it. Demanded more commitment than even she was really ready for. It doesn't mean that he didn't love her, even though it didn't work out, it doesn't even mean he doesn't maybe see things happening in the future. We women tend to be very black and white with relationships. If they don't want a relationship with us, they must not care, if they don't care, we say fuck off. All of this being an inner assumption.
Not true from the majority of guys I speak with.

Many are just not ready, and just felt too trapped, consumed. But I speak with the same guys a year later, and they are ready to settle down. Maybe they regret what happened. But, the woman has closed the door. So the guy moves on. What else can he do.

Of course this scenario works in reverse as well, I was just using a 'for instance'. Quite commonly though it is the woman pressuring the man for more, feeling inadequate and insecure when he doesn't want more, and being devasted when he ends it. But these women have to realise that it isn't them, it's the emotional pace.

By no means am I talking about when it's blatantly obvious your man is an asswiping dickhead of a commitment phobic emotional moron - then just run. far and fast. I'm talking about real life nice couples that don't work out for some reason or another and neither can pinpoint why. Some say 'he had too much baggage and couldn't deal' or 'she was a controlling bitch who wouldn't let me do anything'...there is always more to it isn't there. Every onion has it's layers, and most of the time when you aren't emotionally connected to yourself and what you want it results in behaviours that can destroy a relationship. You have to be honest about what you are ready for. And put the baggage away, once and for all. Deal with it, find someone with a matching set - not easy but worth it - and find out what good emotional pace is all about. And stop blaming yourself or them! We all see the wee red flags, we all have chosen to ignore them, we've all been there. Learn, grow. I've loved someone, deeply and madly, in the past - and we couldn't have been more out of sync. It became painfully more apparent when, in our dying days, he admitted that he never wanted what he said he did, that he had just said it to 'make me happy and make himself want it'...ouch. OUCH. I know I'm not alone, I know that others have gone through this - male and female. I also see where I went wrong, wanting something that I wasn't ready for and maybe trying to polish a turd in the process.

Timing. Is. Everything.


x

green and red eyed holiday themed monster

ah yes, jealousy.
ugly, insecure, pathetic, passionate, regretful jealousy.

you and i have been so called 'pals' for quite awhile now.
and frankly, i'm just not that into you, anymore.

oh sure, at first you were kinda cute, sexy even. getting all riled up
and wrinkling your nose like that, fire in your eyes.

but now, well darlin' you are just plain ugly.

how you ever got into my life in the first place i can't quite recall.
probably around the same time as my first training bra, yes i know it's because my friend's was a bigger one. bitch. and then there was that time that he said he liked me and then asked HER to the dance. slut.

oh but remember that time that we threw the phone across the room and broke it? ya, good times.

my fave has to be this last one though. he had to go and have a pint with HER didn't he. had to get all tipsy and reminisce with her, didn't he. even though he came back to me, told me everything, he still even thought of another person. how dare he. so what if he has known her for 8 years. so what if they had been through a lot together. so what if she is with someone in a ltr now. you and i know the truth right jealousy?

yep. we have it all sorted out.
they are all lying, cheating bastards and we had better call them on it before they break our hearts. and while we are at it, maybe we should continue to make a fool out of ourselves - you know - just to ensure that he thinks we are completely insane. that is always a good chuckle.

ah, j, such a laugh with you.
but i think it's time to move on.

you see, i don't need you in my life anymore. i have enough to worry about, that is tangible, than whether or not some guy i care about has actually spoken to someone else that he cares about. i know he cares about me, so, you have to stop trying to convince me otherwise.

you are no good for me, j, our time has run it's course.
i'm a big girl now, and it isn't cute anymore.

don't be sad though, i know lots of other people who would welcome you with open arms, i know you will never be alone. as long as people put their hearts in the hands of others, there will be insecurity and doubt. as long as we continue to put ourselves on the line for love, you will have a place to rear your ugly head. besides, if it weren't for you we wouldn't have this misconception about love, passion and romance. that says something about your power doesn't it?

don't worry j, i haven't found another neuroses to move in.
i'm full up.

it's not you, it's me.


xoxo
cheekie

keep your expectations low, but be prepared to bring your hopes down to meet them....cheekie 2008

Here I am.
Here I be.
I am me.

A little Cheekie Suess for you there.

Having a rather interesting/difficult/fun/whirlwind of a time right now.

I guess the major thing right now for me is work. Busy as a two dollar hooker.
That's two dollar's American, the Canuck Buck ain't worth crap right now...


The other, as usual, my constant quest to understand men.
I. Give. Up.

What is it about men, either they think themselves way too good for you, or the opposite.
Which is worse?
Why do some men never feel they can measure up, give you what you need.
Is it your expectations being projected, or their own?

I think it is their own.
If you think about the men who say 'I am not good enough for you' or 'I can't give you what you need'...well, the majority have some pretty high expectations of a relationship.
Their parents are/were together a long time.
They grew up in a loving stable home. (generalizing from some personal experiences of late...this certainly isn't the norm)

They want nothing less.
Yet.
They do everything in their power to prove how incapable they are of this.
They drink too much, don't call, sleep with anything....
Do they feel that there is no way to measure up to the example they had?
Do they feel unworthy???

I don't get it. I don't understand. Help me.

No one in their right mind thinks they are perfect at relationships.
No ONE.
No one feels that they are 'good enough' for the absolute best in life.
And don't tell me you do, deep deep down.
Yes, you may feel you 'deserve' happiness, that you are worthy of it.
But honestly, do you really feel that the world owes you the best???

God I hope not.

All I want is someone to laugh with, love with, share with.
That's it.
I don't need a house in the suburbs.
I don't need a man that never drinks/smokes/stays out watching the game with his buddies.

I want to give and receive love and respect.

Now.

Is that too much to ask???
Nope. And darlin' you deserve it too.
And I hope you find it, cause one day, I will.

With or without you.
xoxo
Cheekie

Wanted: Wild men. Only selected applicants will be contacted.

Remember that line from SATC, when Carries says:

'I thought I was looking for someone to tame me, when now I realise that I just want someone wild to run with'...

Well, I've started to realise the same.

All this time I have thought that I could tame, and be tamed.

When fact of the matter is, I want to run wild with someone.

I have been fighting nature for years now, and it has caused me immense grief.

I am not talking about chucking it all to go get drunk and crazy every night.

I am talking about being true to myself, and what I want.

I want someone who wants to, enjoys, lives for the silly things in life.

Who would love nothing more than spur of the moment:

'hey let's go down the street and check out that band'

'let's go to Tahiti next week'

'Heyyyyy, let's go have sex in the backyard...of the neighbour's house'

'call in sick...wink wink'

' let's call everyone and have a party this weekend'

'hey, wanna go for a walk? in Paris?'

and even on occasion, just be damn lazy together. someone who will ask me if I am wearing any panties while we are out, and maybe I am or maybe I'm not. someone who will come up behind me and kiss my neck. someone who will love the way I look at them, and vice versa.

someone who will leave me alone when I want to be left alone, and vice versa.

he confuses, confounds, amazes, perplexes, frustrates, excites, entices, angers and comforts me. who loves me as much for who I am as for what I am not. someone who would be just as happy living in a tent with me as a suburban 3 bdrm with a double car garage. he doesn't need to have a car. doesn't need to have money. doesn't need to have anything. I just want him.

someone who will never expect me to be perfect.

and most definitely vice versa.

Call it drama. Call it whatever you want.

But simple fact of the matter is that this is what I always seem to gravitate towards.

The type of men I  am attracted to.  And I think, it's the reason they are attracted to me.

The rougher type. The slightly off kilter type. The quirky guys. The slightly dangerous guys.

The troubled type.

The Wild Men.

The problem is when I allow my doubts, my fears about not having security and stability, not having 'perfection' to get in the way. Well that is when it all fucks up.

I have been under the misconception that what should be 'normal' is what I should have.

Fuck normal.

I would rather live out the rest of my life in a relationship that makes me happy. The real me happy. I would trade all the stability in the world to be with the one person that could even make that happen for a short time.

I have been grasping at stability and normality my whole life.

And my whole life I have felt something was 'off' and 'wrong' because I didn't have it.

You know why? Because deep down, waaaaaay deep down, I don't give a ratz about it.

Of course,  I don't want to live in a cardboard box, and no, I don't want to struggle financially for the rest of my days. That isn't what I mean by stability.

There are no certainties in life. None.

And part of being a worry wart/anxiety freakshow is the not knowing kills you.

Not knowing what might happen tomorrow causes me such stress. 

But isn't it supposed to be a surprise?

What if you knew everything right this second.

You knew what you were going to have for dinner next week, where you would go on vacation next year, what sex your next child was before you even conceived.

What if you knew the exact moment that your bf would call. Or you would get a promotion.

All these things. If we knew, what the hell would be the point?

I want to be kept on my toes.

I want to run wild. 

Women are crazy and men are stupid. The reason women are crazy is because men are so stupid...

Or are they.
Are they really the 'enemy'?
Truly at fault for all of our pain, anguish...and yes, crazy?

Some of it, hell ya, most of it, nope.

I have a news flash for you.
Men. Are human.
Yup, you heard it here first.

They cry, they hurt, they feel, they mess up, they smile, they laugh, they fight, they love.
Just like us.
Only differently.
The old mars-venus thing.

We seem to have lost touch with our innate differences, and we somehow expect men to react
and behave the way WE would react and behave as women. Recipe for disaster. Especially since these days we really have problems figuring out WHAT to think.

Do you think our Grandmothers sat there freaking out because a boy didn't call when he said he would?
Ask your Gram. I know what mine would say, 'well he is probably busy, he will call when he can'.
Perfect common sense, and probably true. If you ask a male friend his opinion of the same situation, he would say the same. Right? 'prob busy, i'm sure he'll call when he can'

Ask a gf? 'what? but didn't he say he would call? what a jerk, you deserve better'...

Now, have our expectations of men to behave in such a way as to never disappoint us, never mess up and definitely never make us cry caused a bit of a tightrope performance for them?
Imagine the pressure, if you will, of having those expectations on you in order to have someone sleep with you/like you/love you/smile at you. 

Hell ya, they should work for it. But not bleed for it.

Play hard to get, not impossible to be with.

As women, we don't really instinctively understand these things anymore.
We get wound up over the slightest slight.
We forget.
We forget that we inherently know that by nature, men just don't go around nurturing their relationships in the same way
we do. Not that they don't, or do it badly, they just do it differently.

How many times have you said 'But it's so perfect when we are alone together, but then I don't see him for a week and I freak out and he doesn't call/email/text when he says he will'...
What is more important to you?
That your man loves and respects you when he is with you? or that he calls at precisely 8:45 pm on Tuesday.

I know you are probably saying that it's inconsiderate, that I am letting guys off the hook.
I'm not, trust me. But, I think we need a bit of a reality check.
We are giving them too much power over our happiness.
Think about it. Generations ago, when couples were separated for months at a time 

(war, farming, hunting, gathering..)
all they had was perhaps a letter a week/month. Did people give up on each other? No.
Of course now we can communicate 24/7 if we choose to. But.
Have people's natural instincts and though patterns changed? Have men and women as animals changed?  I don't believe so.

Those inherent differences were there 20/200/2000 yrs ago just as they are today.
Only the wrapping (society) has changed. The expectations have changed.
We expect nothing but the best for ourselves and from our men.
We should want to be content and have a good life.

But, is it fair or reasonable to expect/demand it all?
Have people stopped breaking each others hearts?
Have men stopped cheating? No, and now women do it too, just as often.
Do we understand each other any better?
Nope. So. What's going on?

Times have changed drastically since WWII. I think this was a huge turning point.
Women's place in society has changed, shifted, turned itself end to end a few times.
From the 50's housewife to the powersuit 80's to the political candidates and r+b singers buying themselves their own bling...
But are we any the wiser?

Look at Elizabeth Taylor, Grace Kelly, Marilyn Monroe....beautiful, smart, tragic, flawed, independent...but they never ceased to feel the need to 'connect' with a man (sometimes more than a few times)...and they are seen as weak for this. Flawed for needing/wanting a man.

But is it weak? Or is it natural.

Are our expectations fighting our natural needs, wants, desires and dammit, womanliness...

The 'Patient, Long Suffering' wives/women of our past have made us into 'Impatient, Short Suffering' wives/women of today.
No, I am not saying that I want a return to the kitchen. Although I do have a thing for 50's clothes...but for dancing, not vacuuming.
I am talking bigger picture.
Our perceptions of what we feel is owed to us, what we expect from our lives, what we expect from others and society in general. It's quite amazing really.

In all of our talk about equality, power and fairness, have we been fair to ourselves really? And men?
We have given them even more power now over us then they ever have.
And in turn put more pressure on them to measure up.
Are they really that responsible for our every feeling, how our day might turn out or whether or not we will be happy?
The way some of us talk, you would think so. And you know what, it's normal.
It is natural and human to want to connect and share a life.

It's not a weakness.

But I am not seeing much sharing.
I am seeing a lot of taking. On both sides.
Without giving anything back. Or one gives, the other takes.
Or instant gratification. It's easy isn't it. I've done it. No muss, no fuss, no commitment, no emotional bs.

What I want is for women to get back to what we have seem to have lost.
Our inherent beauty, our gift, the thing that makes us who we are and why men can't and wouldn't want to be without us. And something we should be proud of and not ashamed of, or feel that we are being 'played' because we nurture this in ourselves...

it's the one thing that all great women throughout history have had that we seem to be lacking.

It's Knowing. Just Knowing.

Signs, Sweet Charity...and Pay Attention You Dumb Bitch!

Ok. Now, for those who know me,
they know that I am by no means a religious person.

Not even close.
Unless you count me in the Sweet Charity view on religion...

Vittorio- So you are saying that Love is your religion?
Charity- I dunno, but I sure go to 'church' a lot


So imagine my surprise today when I met my Guardian Angel.
Yup. I did. Well, ok, she was the most amazing sweet beautiful 81 yr old lady.
And she sure as hell couldn't have picked me to talk to at a more opportune time.

Here's the scenario:
Waiting for a bus in bumbugger nowhere. This little bit of a lady comes over and asks me
for a smoke, offers to buy one off me. 25 cents. I laughed, and said 'no way are you paying me ma'am...' and I handed her one. After about 5 minutes of trying to light it for her in what could only be described as the winds of Hades that whipped through this backwater hell, we got to chatting....

81, come August. Been widowed 23 yrs, but keeps the house up all by herself.
Spry as a kiddie, and smiling like crazy.
Diagnosed with Cancer last year.
Was given 6 months tops. Last year.

Know what was the first thing she told the nurse?
'I'm going to take up smoking again'...she laughed so hard when she told me this.
The way she looked at it is like this (her words exactly):

'I have been lucky enough to be here for 81 yrs. I have had such a great run. So much fun, so much love, so much laughter. I get up every day, rain shine or snow, and meet my friends at the mall for a coffee and a little shopping. I have beautiful children and grandchildren. Why the hell shouldn't I do whatever I want to? Why shouldn't we all?'

I was dumbfounded.
She had such a beautiful, positive vibe about her that I was so drawn in.
Clear green eyes, sparkly and mischievous. (Green eyes are the most sparkly and mischievous btw...lol...). I was enthralled! She was so sweet and warm. Just lovely!

So we share our respective smokes. Enjoying every last evil puff.
The bus pulls up and we get on. She says 'have a lovely day dear' and sits down.
I wasn't done with her yet! lol. And I told her so!
I sat beside her and we continued to chat.
She asked my name, and I asked hers "Flo" she said.
'Oh as in Florence?' I enquired?
She giggled (seriously, full on school girl) 'No no, it's short for Florida, my parent's were a bit nuts'...we both laughed.
She showed me some wool that she had gotten on sale, so of course, we talked crafty crap for a mo or two.

Then suddenly, she turns to me, with this look in her eyes that can only be described as 'pure earnest' and said
'Most important thing to remember, please remember this dear, is to laugh, is to smile, life is funny, even in the bad times, and if you can remember to do that, well you will never feel alone and you will never feel sad'

I just about lost it. Seriously lost it.
I felt like she had just looked right inside me.
I felt so awed. I can't describe it.
I couldn't say a word. She knew nothing about me, my life, what I have been going through.
None of it.
How did she know that those words were EXACTLY the words I needed to hear?
My eyes were filled with tears, not sad ones, humble ones.

It was her stop, and she went to get off and said
'I will remember you, and next time I see you I will bring my cigarettes and give you one!'...
And poof, like that, my Guardian Angel disappeared.

And I was left smiling with big fat tears, the kind you had when you were 3, perched ready to roll...

All the self help books in the world, all the over analyzing, all the talk talk talk, and all it took was one sweet, wise, smoking granny to make me finally get it. Hopefully it sticks.

Further to the surrealness of my day.
Well, I saw him.
Him. My ex. I haven't seen him in 2 years.
Every day for the past 7 years he has been in my presence, thoughts, dreams...I thought I was going to be with him forever. He Was The One.
But.
It ended badly. Very badly.
I heard I would see him today.
And you know what? I thought of my Angel, Florida.
I turned the anxiety I felt around. I said hello to it, then said, but you know what stupidhead anxiety???

It will be really nice to see him. And I kept that thought.

And you know what?
It really was nice to see him.
It wasn't painful. It wasn't gut wrenching.
It wasn't hard.
A bit nerve wracking, but manageable.
I didn't want to cry. I didn't want to run.
I didn't want to yell.

Did seeing him make me miss him? Sure, only natural.
Did thoughts of 'what if' cross my mind? Of course, again, natural.

But, I didn't think of all of these worries when I saw him, all I honestly thought was
'Wow, it is really nice to see him again'.
Honest.
And I left the day with a smile on my face.
And thankful for having spent my day with two beautiful people who were meant
to come into this life to teach me something, if I would just pay attention.

xxoo

Bastards into Perfect Partners....

I read this post by NML of the most excellent baggage-reclaim site


and the whole darn thing has me very perplexed.
why?
because it is so true, and it affects us, as women, often.
very very very very often.
it jabs right down into our very 'essence'.
we question ourselves for our man's lack of ability to commit to us, and then commit to someone else. it makes us wonder about our ability to nurture. the very thing we are told we are made to do. is their new love better at it all?

are they a better lover/cook/girlfriend
are they more understanding/patient/sexy
do his parents like HER better? his friends? colleagues?

what was so wrong with us when we gave them everything?

nothing. right?
absolutely fucking nothing.

do I know why these guys drop us claiming inability to commit only to pick up and hook up with someone else shortly thereafter? fuck no. wish I did...

I am pretty sure that it has happened to most of you out there (male and female, far be it from me to discriminate).
does or did it make you feel inferior or damaged in any way shape or form?
did it make you question your abilities to have and keep a partner?
especially when someone obviously so deficient in 'commitment' goes on to have exactly what you wanted with them, but with someone else. it hurts. a lot.

In case you haven't noticed, either I pick the wrong guys, or they pick me. that is up for debate. (later later...)
After reading another one of NML's posts about that very subject regarding our (the royal female 'we') projecting OUR unavailability.

seriously. are our fears of commitment and failing causing us to pick the wrong guys?
are our shortcomings and inability to deal with them making us pick relationships that are going to mess us up more, and be able to blame the guy instead of just dealing with our own shit?
when will we take accountability for just being the dumbasses that we can be sometimes by choosing guys that we KNOW are bad for us.
yes yes, I know, he kisses like he means it, he fucks like he means it...he looooooovvveeees you. right.
if he loved you (or me) so much, then why is he with someone else right now???

no, the world isn't that black and white sometimes, but frankly, love can be.
and until we start raising the bar for ourselves, and realizing that mistakes get made(move the hell on)...and to just hope to hell that each failure means we are that much closer to finding the one.

if there is the one. oh shit, I just did it again didn't I...sorry sorry, I will stop being sooooo jaded.

of course there is the ONE. yippee!! I can't WAIT to find him!!! *hearts, hugs, cheesey emoticons*

ya, I just threw up a little in my mouth too...

another from the vault!

Hey kids...here is another posting from the recent past...thought it tied in with my last one a bit.
I would love to hear your thoughts/comments/complaints/whinging/anger about anything I write.
I do so love a good debate! teehee....
xo
cheekie

I think I might be looking for something that doesn't exist.
A fabrication of my imagination.

The "nice" bad boy.

You know, just a decent, nice, sweet, sexy guy. You know, that I can't keep my hands off of, and vice versa. Who has a job, but loves to go out and get silly occasionally?

Men, you do realize that your behaviour is what makes us bitter, right?
When it comes down to it, getting treated like crap gets to you after a while.
Then you wonder why so many women seem nutty, or bitter, or even both.
And I am not one of those girls who lets herself be treated like crap.

I am pretty darn honest and I will come right out and ask a guy what the deal is. However, it doesn't seem to matter, cause apparently honesty scares them too. Even though every single one of them claims to “hate games” and “lying”.
They all end up with the chicks who play the most games…wtf?

So, just so we women have this straight, men are afraid of the following:

• commitment
• honesty
• women over 30
• women with kids
• women who make their own money
• women who seem needy/not needy enough
• women with emotions
• women who are slighty confused/bitter/nutty....but harmless

Usually that bitterness is due to self protection, and if you dig a bit deeper guys, you will probably find an extremely sensitive, caring woman, who just doesn't know what the f*ck to do anymore.

Is there more? Do you guys have a brochure somewhere I can get my hands on?

Yes yes, I know you guys supposedly only think about one thing, and given any opportunity you are going to take it, chance it, see what happens. But for crying out loud, is there nothing more to you? If there is, it would be really nice to see it every once in a while.

Whatever happened to wooing? Whatever happened to actually holding hands and kissing and actually being nice to one another?
Everyone is such a player these days, including women, too much choice.
Like shopping in a catalogue or off a conveyor belt.
You don't even need to care about anyone anymore. You have your friends, you don't need more friends. You are out looking for the easy uncomplicated night, or nights. All these online dating services prove just that point. Have you ever checked them out??? It is worse than a bar.

At least in person you can get a "vibe", some kind of connection. You are more likely to be a bit more gentle with someone when you have to talk face to face....online or texting/email? You can do and say whatever you want.
It is almost like the other person isn't a human being at all, just a hot pic and nice abs/tits...or worse, in the case of texting, and you don't even need to answer them. Maybe I am too sensitive, maybe I have my expectations set too high.
Since when, though, is a little bit of compassion, a little bit of decency setting the bar too high?

I am no prude, trust me, definitely not. And when the time is right in a relationship, I can be just as horny as the next guy...
if not more.
I just so much want to be treated nicely, and to treat someone else nicely that it gets so frustrating when all people are doing these days is going for the disposable. Well, I am not disposable. Nor will I ever be.

An intense, slightly bitter, definitely nutty - yet still a fun, caring, sexy, sensitive woman.
Definitely. So go easy.
My heart still breaks. Does yours? or have you all become so desensitized that you have convinced yourself it doesn’t matter anymore…